Apple Redesigns iPhone to Paper-Thin Proportions: Finally Achieving Peak Impracticality!
In a move that no one outside Apple's design team was asking for, the tech giant has announced their plan to release an ultra-thin iPhone in 2025. Customers, who have long clamored for substantial functional improvements such as larger batteries, were stunned by the decision. The new model, which Tim Cook himself claimed would be 'revolutionary,' is reported to be as thin as a single sheet of lasagna. Apple seems to be under the impression that thinner is always better—despite public feedback to the contrary.Tim Cook reportedly described the new iPhone as 'more like a wheat thin,' finally catering to the whimsical requests of niche snack enthusiasts. One Reddit user sarcastically cheered, 'I've been asking for a phone that is more like wheat thins and finally, I'm getting it!' Customers seem less excited; one remarked, 'But I don’t want it to be thinner. Just give me a bigger battery.' Apple has yet to comment on how they plan to address concerns of battery life, with many users noting they'd gladly accept a phone that's a few millimeters thicker to accommodate extra battery capacity. Another user humorously added, 'This is not what people meant by a foldable!' The persistent call for more battery life and flush cameras continues to be drowned out by Apple's relentless pursuit of form over function. Maybe one day, the design team will listen—and when they do, pigs might fly.
In a move that no one outside Apple's design team was asking for, the tech giant has announced their plan to release an ultra-thin iPhone in 2025. Customers, who have long clamored for substantial functional improvements such as larger batteries, were stunned by the decision. The new model, which Tim Cook himself claimed would be 'revolutionary,' is reported to be as thin as a single sheet of lasagna. Apple seems to be under the impression that thinner is always better—despite public feedback to the contrary.Tim Cook reportedly described the new iPhone as 'more like a wheat thin,' finally catering to the whimsical requests of niche snack enthusiasts. One Reddit user sarcastically cheered, 'I've been asking for a phone that is more like wheat thins and finally, I'm getting it!' Customers seem less excited; one remarked, 'But I don’t want it to be thinner. Just give me a bigger battery.' Apple has yet to comment on how they plan to address concerns of battery life, with many users noting they'd gladly accept a phone that's a few millimeters thicker to accommodate extra battery capacity. Another user humorously added, 'This is not what people meant by a foldable!' The persistent call for more battery life and flush cameras continues to be drowned out by Apple's relentless pursuit of form over function. Maybe one day, the design team will listen—and when they do, pigs might fly.